Art by Vincent Litoux
“Look, I give up.
I give up in trying to change the world. To one opinion I have, there are ten differing opinions.
We can’t be on the same page. There are slow readers, fast readers and people who do not read at all.
I give up.
We all want to change the world.
But each of us want the world to be a certain way we think it should be.
I give up.
We have trouble coming to an agreement. There is always, always a differing of opinions.
I rather just go into this fantasy world I’ve created. I like it here.
You be there.
And I’ll be here.
Here, I can make my world anyway I want it to be. I can be anything I want to be. Say whatever I want to say. Do whatever I want to do.
There is no one to judge or ridicule or scoff or question me.
I am fine with me.
I can pretend I’m a hero saving the princess. I can be an astronaut traveling to deep space. I can be a pirate on a journey across the sea. A monk atop a mountain. An eagle soaring over the skies. A whale swimming in the sea. A large walking and talking tree. A dragon who is capable of flying and swimming. A shape shifting dog. A time traveling humanoid. A magician. A warrior elf. Or simply.. lying on the grass and observing the clouds roll pass.
No worries. No responsibilities.
I can be anything.
No one is there to say, “But you know in real life it does not work this way, right?”
Or, “You’re idealistic. Too imaginative. Grow up.”
I give up.
I don’t know if this is real life.
Sometimes I have dreams. In my dreams, I at times feel they’re real.
And when I wake up, they’re just dreams.
And when I go into my fantasy world, this “reality” that you so passionately believe in becomes a dream to me.
I am a fictional character. I come from a realm of imaginative creativity.
This “reality”.. I don’t know what it really is. It scares me.
I just want to be here.. in my fantasy world. I am carefree here. Thoughtless.
It’s my safe space.
You know, when this “reality” of yours first began, it was just like this fantasy world I made.
There were no rules.
And then, somewhere along the way, you and I forgot that this “reality” is just as fantastical as the one I just created. A quirky, sophisticated, complex, hipsterish, modern “reality”.
Rules were made. Rules were broken. People took it too seriously.
And the entire fun was taken out from it.
It’s like forcing children to play hide and seek.
Remember that game?
It used to be fun.
Remember the thrill of running to find a place to hide as your friend counted to 50?
Remember the joys of discovering a friend?
I once found a friend hiding in a drain. It took me nearly 20-minutes to find him.
What happened to all that?
Why do we force people to go into hiding?
“Don’t say this, it’s not nice. Don’t do this, it’s not good. Shut up or you’ll be slapped.”
Why do we force people to come out of hiding?
“Wipe them all out. Kill them all. Flush them out.”
Why.. do we do this?
The fault is mine.
You’re right. I am to be blamed. No one else.
I took this game too seriously.
And that is why I’m going into my fantasy realm.
Here, it is just me and only me.
I won’t hurt anyone.
No one can hurt me.
It’s just me and only me.
Only this time.. this time I will remember.”
The star then collapsed onto itself and exploded into a trillion different pieces.
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